Did you know that there are three types of fear that limit you in achieving your goals? They stop you from achieving your true potential and best performance in all areas of your life. They prevent you from starting your own business, traveling, changing jobs or starting the gym.
I will show you what these types of FEAR are and how you can overcome this so that you can achieve everything you have in mind.
FEAR stops us
You, me and the rest of the world … we can achieve so much in our lives. Unfortunately, instead we let ourselves become over ridden by fear and often we are not even aware of it. Fear is the reason why most people stay average and do not make the choices to do the things that they really find AWESOME in life.
Fear keeps people average. They do not dare to make the choices to do the things that they really find AWESOME in life.
Imagine that a GREAT idea comes to your mind, followed almost immediately by a “what if …” thought. Bye-bye AWESOME idea, Hello fear. A pity, because how often does that ‘what if’ thought actually come true? Perhaps 1% out of all the thousands of times you were afraid of something. If you learn what fear is FOR REAL, you can overcome it.
Understand what fear is, then you can overcome it.
In high performance we also call this the “Competence / Confidence Loop”
The more you do something, the better you get at it, you build more confidence. Take a look back at the past months. Were there new steps in your life that at first might have been frightening for you? But you went for it, you built on that idea, took the necessary actions and now you have the results to show for it.
The more you do something, the better you get at it, you build more confidence.
So it’s time to work on overcoming your fears. Let’s have a look at the three types of fear that you can control from now on:
# 1 Overcome the Pain of loss
A fear that plays with many people is that they are scared of losing or having to let go of the things they love or what they are attached to.
Think about it:
- Your afraid of losing what you currently enjoy so much but you know you will have to give this up if you want to do something new;
- Your scared of losing your job if you prioritize something else before it;
- You’re scared to say “no” to a customer even though it’s the right thing to do but you know you won’t get the sale.
Let’s face it, we’ve all experienced this kind of fear.
When I started my company in 2011, I always said “YES” to new customers because I was afraid that I would lose them. I also always had a “what if … thought after I said yes: “What if this customer stops soon, how do I pay my fixed costs?”
Fear of loss is something that almost every marketer is aware of. Companies always use their marketing strategies to make you worried about what you could lose… But this kind of emotional blackmail doesn’t stop at companies… people around you do the same:
- You told a friend that you wanted to stop working for a boss and he responded with: “Suppose entrepreneurship goes wrong, then you will have no job.”
- Or when you took a big step towards something and your family questioned it: “Are you sure you want to do that? Suppose it goes wrong, then what?! “
Goodbye geat idea…
The more you think of something, the greater the fear becomes. To change that you have to get started with your mindset. Change your focus to the things you will GET if you followed through with your idea. What are all those great things that you would have if you were persistent, despite the fear?
There are 2 ways you can do that:
Consider what you WILL GAIN: What good will come from that courageous step you take? More money, love, peace or freedom? Make it clear to yourself.
Convert loss to gain: What are you going to lose? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO GAIN? For example: less income initially -> more income eventually and for the long term. Uncertainty -> Certainty.
To overcome the fear of loss, you must become aware of the negative and frightening thoughts and stop: “What if …”
# 2 Overcome the Pain Of Change
Change is not easy. I remember when I switched from playing the keyboard to the electric guitar and had to learn all over again. Reading notes was completely different and well, a guitar is very different from a keyboard. I remember that I frightened myself by writing stories in my head like:
“Now I have to practice for days to master this.”
“Do I have to practice even more now?”
“I will have to start again with all those boring simple songs such as” father Jacob “etc.”
We also call this process pain. The pain that makes you think that a “new move” mainly involves negative things.
Just think about that …
A smoker who wants to quit smoking and already has the ‘fear’: “What if I get the urge to smoke?” or “What if I get withdrawal symptoms?” “What if we have a barbecue and all my friends have a smoke?” . ”
Someone who really wants to lose weight but is already stressing about the idea… “Really… then I will have to cycle to the gym every day. They will look at me and think “look at that hopeless case in the gym”. “I will have to eat healthier and do more shopping etc ”
When you read this, you immediately see what the pitfalls are with this way of thinking. It is what we do with almost every change that is outside our comfort zone: to view everything in a negative way instead of a positive way.
Bye Bye Any Positive Change…
Are you done with this fear? Then look at what all the positive consequences of overcoming your struggle would be. Losing weight may switch on instant negative thoughts. But you also have to know that there will be many, many, many positive outcomes such as more energy, feeling happier, more self-confidence, slower ageing, etc.
The mastery of life is learning to see struggles and challenges as a game where you can reach your highest potential in your life. Embrace it, look it in the eyes and bring the joy! Stop the negative and convert it to positive.
The mastery of life: learn to see struggles and challenges as a game where you can reach your highest potential in your life. Embrace it, look it in the eyes and bring the joy! Stop the negative and convert it to positive.
# 3 Overcome The Worry Of The Outcome
The last fear that we experience and can overcome is the worry of the outcome.
The worry of the outcome is simply that all the effort that we put into something might not be worth it.
Do you recognize this? What if…
- I do all this work and take risks and the result is no better than when I started?
- It takes a lot of time to do this, but I’m not going to make anymore money?
- I work so hard and do everything I can but I can’t get any closer to my goal?
I have often experienced this. When I have wanted to start something new and my mind immediately saw all these potential problems. This fear is present in many entrepreneurs. It is this fear that immediately destroys dreams and as a result of which 98% of people stay average because they do not dare to take the step.
Are you familiar with the Law of Attraction? The Law Of Attraction states that you get everything you think of, good or bad! This is far from ‘wo-wo’ it is scientifically proven. To understand this more watch The Secret on Netflix or read this book. When you know this you will realize how important it is to think about the positive consequences of the courageous choice you are going to make.
Bye-bye Worry Of The Unknown!
Are you done with all the unecessary worry? Then say to yourself:
“If I make this choice today, I will enjoy it because …. and because …. and because ….”
So you are going to talk about everything that you will enjoy and what it will bring you. Everything revolves around your mindset:
The law of attraction: you get what you think about
Where attention goes, energy flows (positive or negative).
So start asking these questions from today:
What do I really want to achieve in my life? And what is the reason that I am not there yet or why am I not reaching my goal fast enough?
These two questions are key to moving forward in your life. These are two questions that I ask myself every day and that my coaching clients ask themselves every day.
If you really want to make your dreams come true, stop having negative thoughts and say goodbye to the three fears.